Central Park crime rate at 50 year low

Editorial: First homeless people disappear, then the muggings stop, what a surprise.

Homeless people disappearing from Central Park. Crime rates plummetting. Coincidence, I think not. It's about time the mayor did something about it and it looks like with the upcoming election, he finally has.

The Hungry Hungry Hippies have denied they have resorted to cannibalism, saying they only eat rich, capitalist oppressors.

Stinky Beatnik had this to say:
Don't bring me down manthe slithy toves The trees of life are dripping withblood-stained dew. Beyond the shady shadows there's little else to do It's been doing that for weeks except to flap my arms and utter a coo while my best lady's predisposed in the palace Highlighting and underlying my deep insignificance, but nothing's easy for an ex-football coach named Alice across the raging fires in the palace Highlighting and underlying my you slushed blue guru.